#13. Transform Polarized Relationships Into Cooperative Ones (?)
Trough Models
Citizens of the US are addicted to contempt for those who don’t see things the way that they do. The trends are climbing for:
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Social media algorithms to get and monetize more eyeballs by fanning contempt rather than kind, earned praise
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Politicians using partisan fake-news accusations and boasts
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Podcasters promoting conspiracies to attract and monetize more eyeballs.
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Anonymous internet trolls retweeting scornful, fake news and threatening alternative-view folks
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Cases of estranged family members and/or work colleagues due to alternate, bumper-sticker opinions.
What can we do from the bottom up to transform contempt into mutual regard and collaboration?
One simple, powerful tool to check out is “The Dignity Index”. It has a 1 to 8 scale. Lower scores (1-4) reflect a lack of dignity and the presence of contempt, with the lowest score (1) showing the most contempt (violent words, actions). The higher scores (5-8) reflect language grounded in dignity, with the highest score (8) showing the most dignity. If school kids are learning to say -“lets discuss this (brewing argument) with 5 and up words” - maybe adults can too.
For learning more about this powerful tool you can (if you are a reader):
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Google: “What is the history of the Dignity Index?” And, click on the “deeper dive in AI mode”.
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Go to the website: www.dignity.us/about. Be sure to check out “resources” to be able to instantly talk to your – rebellious kids, idiot relatives, and cantankerous work colleagues – in a more collaborative way.
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And/or, if you like compelling interviews, go to:
a. This short introduction interview with Index co-founder, Tim Shriver. (under 8 minutes, quite intriguing).
www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SgJ7GsuIeQ
b. For a fascinating, engaging hour+ watch Tim’s presentation at the Aspen Institute last summer (’24).
Regular readers of my blogs know that I’m on a “mastery path to wisdom” kick. I think that the Index is a great – parenting, teaching, coaching, mentoring, leadership – tool. Using it will also be a catalyst for developing other wisdom traits.
Closing Questions:
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Is getting on the journey to greater wisdom-skills worthwhile?
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How would you define “wisdom” to begin with?
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How do we master the art and science of the mastery-process to apply to any soft, pro-social skills that we or others might want to improve?
For more on these questions go to
www.merrifield.com and check out my new blog series.